Meet your new therapist. They're slow to respond, terrible at scheduling, and honestly? They might fall asleep mid-session. But hey, at least they're hanging in there with you. This sloth gets it. Life moves too fast, expectations are too high, and sometimes you just need someone who understands the art of doing absolutely nothing... very, very slowly. Consider this your official permission slip to take it easy. Doctor's orders. (The doctor is a sloth. The sloth is not licensed.) Why you'll love it: Soft, lightweight, and more comfortable than your last relationship 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (Heather colors contain polyester) Fabric weight: 4.2 oz./yd.² (142 g/m²) — substantial enough to hide snack crumbs Pre-shrunk fabric (unlike your motivation) Side-seamed construction for a flattering fit on all body types Shoulder-to-shoulder taping because we've got your back (slowly) Perfect for: Netflix marathons, avoiding responsibilities, explaining why you're late ("my shirt told me to slow down"), and reminding everyone that self-care looks different for everyone. Size guide LENGTH (inches) WIDTH (inches) CHEST (inches) XS 27 16 ½ 31-34 S 28 18 34-37 M 29 20 38-41 L 30 22 42-45 XL 31 24 46-49 2XL 32 26 50-53 3XL 33 28 54-57 4XL 34 30 58-61
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