Hi, I’m benny blanco. I’m in a television show with my best friend Dave and I probably produced most of the songs you have heard on the radio from 2008 until now. When I was thirteen, my friend got a George Foreman Grill and it changed my life forever. We would invite friends over, get stoned, and make the most elaborate sandwiches our prepubescent minds could fathom. I became obsessed with food and cooking for friends. I know what you are going to say, and I get it. Cooking is scary. But I promise you, once you get into it, it will be your new addiction. Slicing an onion is like taking a Xanax to me. I made this cookbook to teach you everything I know about food, cooking, and throwing the greatest dinner party of all time. There are the basics to get your kitchen ready, a little advice from my expert friends, then all of the dinner party menus I love to make, like: 5 Dishes to Get You Laid and One for the Morning After I Wish I Were an Italian Grandma Take Me to the Cheesy Rodeo F*ck Morton’s Steakhouse Which are filled with insane recipes like: Lose Your Mind Lobster Rolls “I Might Go Vegetarian” Veggie Sandwich Chicken Cutlets with Honey, Peppers, and Parm “I Hope We Didn’t Make a Baby” Breakfast Burrito. I’ve been told some of the finest stories over meals. I’ve laughed so hard I thought I was going to actually die. I’ve fallen in love—sometimes with the food, sometimes with the person across the table. I’ve cried in good ways, and I’ve cried in bad ways. I hope you’ve been lucky enough to have all these same memories and then some. But if you haven’t, I can make you a promise. If you follow these three simple steps, it will all become a reality: Open this book. Open your heart. And open wide, baby.
